Getting over the break -up and past the let's get back together phase!

Okay, so I haven't blogged in a while. I have been busy working on my dissertation, hanging with friends, and trying to get over heartbreak.

At first of course it was easy. I had a date each week and a something fun to do. But eventually a moment of silence and stillness comes over me and it hits me. What hits me is - heartache.

Overtime, I lose sight of why we broke up in the first place and then start thinking about the "good" times and suddenly I am seeing the person and talking on the phone. Only in a few days to realize that it's not going to work and then I remember why it didn't work.

So in the mist of my teary sadness -this time- I got on the Internet and begin reading articles about people that have experienced the same pain. Being the researcher that I am, here is a list of the tips that I found most helpful!

1. Allow yourself to be whatever you feel. Don't try to avoid or hide your pain. You are human and most human people feel. If you loved someone and it didn't work out of course its going to hurt. But that is okay. Grieve until you feel better
2. Go out with your friends. LIVE, LOVE, and LAUGH!
3. Talk about your pain or write it down.
4. Don't send nasty email sor leave crazy messages - it only makes things worse and its a temporary fix
5. Don't let your anger rule you.
6. Do something new and try new things
7. Read sites and tips that help you get over you love hump
8. Date but only at your pace. Don't move to fast. You will only end up hurting someone that had nothing to do with your past
9. DO NOT CALL, TAKE CALLS, or EMAIL YOUR Ex. Even if they call you, its best to ignore it because if you don't old feeling will reoccur and your heart will break all over again
10. Keep the old relationship is balance. If it didn't work because your needs were not met or the person accused you of something you didn't do then accept that. Don't rationalize it.
11. Don't listen to other people that don't know the details but want you to be with someone that didn't make you happy.
12. Give yourself time to heal. Day by day it gets easier.
13. Forgive yourself if you make the fatal mistake and contact your ex. Stuff happens
14. Don't become friends with your ex until you are READY. Understand the you and your ex may never be friends and that's okay too!
15. Believe that a new and better love awaits you. I know you can't see it now but something new and worthwhile will come your way.